Friday, April 06, 2007

Life is Complicated enough already

I had just ordered an Americano at Caffe Nero’s when the elderly lady standing in front of me asked;

“What exactly is an Americano?”

“Well it’s just a coffee really.” (Sharp and incisive!) “Its an espresso with hot water added.” I went on quickly.

She thought for a moment. “And do you have it with milk?” she asked.

“Well I do, but it’s not compulsory.” I smiled at her.

“Hot or cold?”

“Sorry?” I said

“The Milk, hot or cold?”

“Oh I see, well I have it with hot, but you could have it with cold, no problem.”

“Why hot?” she asked. What was this twenty questions?

I said that I just liked it that way, which was half the story. I suppose I am a bit sad really but I always decide what I want before I go into Nero’s. I go in and when asked what I want I say;

“A regular Americano, with hot milk to drink in please!”

It makes life simpler, less complicated.

The alternative is;

Me “I’ll have an Americano please!”

Barista “Regular or Large?”

Me “Regular please”

Barista “With Milk?”

Me “Um yes please”

Barista “Hot or cold?”

Me “Hot please”

Barista “Are you drinking it in or out?”

Me (wishing I had gone else where) “IN PLEASE!”

So I leave nothing to chance and know what I want. Which is why taking the fledglings into Caffe Nero is a very stressful experience. Not only do they not know what they want, but also when they eventually do decide, they will then change their minds at the last minute. I guess its more interesting than money!

2 comments:

Kim Ayres said...

M&S confound things further by having "Small" and "Regular" as their sizes, instead of "Regular" and "Large" which is what they really are. It's a cynical marketing ploy so that anyone who isn't in the know and automatically orders a regular coffee ends up paying more for a larger one.

Bastards.

Good coffee though.

The Birdwatcher said...

Thanks I will remember that! The coffee at Nero's is fine, its the palaver you have to go through to get it. B ut then as the kids keep on telling me - I'm old and sad and need to move with the times!